Sunday, March 2, 2008

Reality

Thank you Paige, Selena, Kelleylynn, Elizabet, and Rachel, for not only your vote of confidence but for sharing with me "success" stories I can strive, over the next several years, to recreate in our own family by way of homeschooling! I am beginning to feel excited, even anxious, to get started yet at the same time so apprehensive about the reality of being home all day long with all four of my darling children. If you don't mind my asking, I think it would help for me to know in advance some of the challenges I should expect to face when the novelty both for them and for me begins to wear thin and the initial enthusiasm starts to fizzle.

What, in your opinion, are some of the more challenging aspects of home education? Do you ever wring your hands in exasperation, swear you're dropping your kids off first thing in the morning at the door of the public junior high school (grade school, etc) , or end the day in tears overwhelmed by the responsibility of being a mother, a homemaker, a wife and an educator? For those of you who were homeschooled, did you ever feel lonely or isolated? I looked in my homeschool catalogue for testimonials that included phrases like "sometimes really frustrating but still worth it" or "my children bicker constantly and it drives me nuts but one day last week, Hallelujah! they worked on a science project together and both enjoyed it!" but all I found were photos of kids reading chapter books on the beach and homeschooling anecdotes glowing optimistically with unreserved satisfaction.

I have this sneaking suspicion that my bad habits, that my sons' and daughters' bad habits, won't automatically be annihilated when we don our new role as "homeschoolers". I have this hope, however, that the good experiences will outweigh by far the tough ones.

Am I right?

7 comments:

Lucy said...

Molly,

Congratulations on deciding to homeschool! I'm sure it will be hard, but I know it's worth it. I was homeschooled from fifth grade through high school. I'm so grateful and am still amazed that my mother put up with me (and my three younger brothers). I know she spent a lot of time crying, but being at home was a huge blessing for us kids. I thought when I went to college that I would be so backwards and not know anything. In fact, that was not the case at all.

Now I have three children myself. I had planned to homeschool, but I've had some health problems the last couple of years and it just has not been possible. My son is in a classical education Core Knowledge charter school. But homeschooling in the future is still on my radar, depending on how the kids do in school and the types of friendships they develop.

Have you chosed a curriculum? Several of my friends who homeschool are using My Father's World and really like it.

I look forward to reading about your experience!

Kelleylynn said...

Dear Molly,

Okay, you want brutal honesty -- it can be tough! BUT! There are many days that are simply joyful!
On a practical note, organization is important. No, you do not need to be uber-organized, more discipline to wake up and get motivated.
Start with prayer, start with something to eat, get them to make their beds, give them room for independence, which will pay-off greatly down the road. If this is all that you do that day, then Thank God for small milestones.
Some days stay in your pj's and read, read, read. Make some cookies and hug them.
Curriculum is a hard one to offer advice on because every family has there own unique differences.
DO NOT compare yourself with others...research where & what you'd like to fit into your lives --the choices are endless!
Get hubby involved -- it helps a great deal to "swap" subjects. For example, Deacon Raphael is great with history and science but loathes teaching the fundamentals of grammar, which is essential in writing...oh! sounds like this subject is just for you!
Plan field trips, library day, local theatre, run around the yard - even in winter. Enjoy life together. Teach them life skills!
Hang in there and give yourself room for trial & error...
You cannot go wrong when it comes to quality time spent together and lots of love.
One more thing that I love to repeat "It is not all about what is taught but rather what is caught"
Love & prayers...I hope this helped. I'm a phone call away...

Has said...

Molly, read this blog entry:

http://morningcoffee.blogspot.com/2008/02/why-i-homeschool-and-how-i-do-it.html

You might already know this blogger.

I don't know anyone who has been through homeschool, nor do I know anyone who is doing it right now. But I am very interested in doing it myself!

Love Selena.

PS If you care to share, I wonder what your children, especially Elijah and Priscilla, thought about leaving their school and staying home?

Holy Ascension New Building said...

Dear Molly,
I am sure I have told you this before, but the most difficult things I found about homeschooling are:
1. Taking the kids EVERYWHERE with me, whether it is for a jug of milk or a gynecology appointment. This may be easier for you because I am sure your parents and lovely Paige (HI!) will be willing to help.
2. Homeschooling with any younger kids under the age of 4. I had a trick of putting the said child/children into the shower (no danger of drowning) to "play" until the hot water ran out. Also, nap time was a convenient school time.
3. The kids fighting. Which is also one of the good things about homeschooling. We took many breaks to "cool off" on the trampoline or finish crying in one's room, and then had to face each other and try all over again.

I really think you'll do a great job, Molly. You'll do all of the things you do now, just more of it!! And some day your dad will have them podcasting in his studio!
Love to all,
Janine

Molly Sabourin said...

Lucy,
I admire very much your faith and flexibility. I am sure it wasn't easy to change gears like that and put your kids in school (although it sounds like a neat one!)due to health issues. Your willingness to temporarily sacrifice your ideals, for the greater good of your family, is inspiring. I think I am going with Sonlight Curriculum as that is what I am most familiar with. I like that it is all laid out in a binder. The less complicated the better for me at the moment.

Kelleylynn,

I think your advice about getting up early and starting with prayer will be crucial for my success. It is so tempting to want to sleep in even 15 more minutes but I always pay the price later for doing that.
My husband really wants to participate in any way possible but that will be difficult due to an insane work commute. I thought that maybe Sat. afternoon science projects would be good.

Selena,

Thanks for the link! I totally related to her reasons for pulling her kids out of school. I also liked her morning routine which included prayers and the Gospel and Epistle reading. That sounds sooo lovely to me in contrast to our mad morning rush. Regarding my kids' reactions: Elijah (9) is thrilled! Priscilla (6) goes back and forth between excitement and uneasiness. She genuinely likes school so that is more difficult for me. Benji (5) and Mary (2) are just going with the flow as usual.

Hi Janine!

I love your shower idea! I remembered recently about the joys of splashing in water. Now Mary plays in our sink for much of the afternoon! That does sound a bit daunting to me - bringing everyone everywhere, but I will just have to get used to it, I suppose. I was home all day today and felt super claustrophobic so we will have to get out sometimes next year to keep me sane. I was just asking Troy last night about a Trampoline, knowing how much your kids (and my kids) love yours. As always, I wish we lived closer together.

Sarah said...

Molly,

I thought about your question to those of us who were homeschooled and after thinking about it for a while, I can't recall a time that I ever felt isolated. I'm sure I may have, but that isn't a memory that stuck with me. As I mentioned, my mom homeschooled me and my three sisters. That alone meant that I was always around people. My mom probably felt more isolated than we kids did!

My parents were always making sure we were involved with other kids our ages. Over the years, I was involved in ballet classes, church homeschool groups, city homeschool groups, children's choir, etc. At one point, in Jr. High, I had activities going on almost every day.

The low points of being educated at home were some of lessons I am most thankful for now. I always had to be around my sisters, and we fought more than I like to recall. I was one who had a bad temper and physically lashed out against my sisters, and Mom was always, always there to discipline me. I really do think my temper was spanked out of me in some ways. ;-) But, ultimately, I learned to related to my family in ways that were loving and honoring, and I know that being at home was a huge par of me learning that.

My mom didn't ever use any set curriculum (which I actually preferred to a rigid curriculum), she wasn't always super organized , and she did cry from time to time-- that sure got our attention and made us shape up! Like KellyLynn mentioned, "It is not all about what is taught but rather what is caught." You have love, you have life knowledge, and you have a lot of resourced to help impart academic knowledge. I have confidence in you!

Molly Sabourin said...

Sarah,

I really appreciate your thoughtful and honest response! I have a lot of respect for your mother as she obviously did a great job raising and educating you and your siblings. It is good to hear, from your perspective, that the discipline wasn't permanently resented. I have to admit that it is tempting when you have a particularly challenging child to get them into school asap for their "development" and for a break from the intensity of relating to him or her for hours at a time. But I agree with you, that for that special child even more love, time, and consistency is needed. Thank you for the reminder that I, as a mother, do not have to be flawless in front of my family - that even my tears and limitations can have a positive impact in the long run.